Not Today Time Wasters!

Are a you a new independent provider in the sex work industry? Congratulations on starting your own business! Like any new business owner you’re probably looking forward to experiencing the excitement of working for yourself. That excitement can spill over into making content for whatever platform you have chosen to advertise on. Like any entrepreneur who just launched their own business you are proud of yourself. You’re ready to start seeing clients. So you check your inbox and see a lot of inquiries. More than what you expected! You select one and proceed to go through your screening protocol, during the screening process your potential client asks a question that was explicitly answered in your advertisement.

At this point you may think your potential client may have missed something in your ad. Ok, so you advise this potential client on information that is clearly posted in your ad. You move on through the screening but they ask several questions this time and all the answers are in your ad. You wonder if they even read your ad. But wait, they had to read it, how else would they have found your contact information? Annoyed by this potential client you decide to just move on to the next inquiry in your inbox.

This next client asks for experiences you don’t provide and do not advertise. You advised the client of what you provide and what you don’t, however they began asking for details of what you do and before you know it, an hour has passed. You have chatted with them giving them details of what kind of experience you provide. At the hour mark you get frustrated, you decide it's past time for them to book a session and you communicate this only to be greeted with more questions or even worse…dick pics!!!

Wtf? You realize you have spent almost two hours dealing with these people who ended up not booking! To make matters worse you get more people who want to chat about what you do or ask questions that you have already answered in your ads! In horror you realize your time has been wasted and you're emotionally drained. You have just been had by Time Wasters.

Time Wasters are a challenge for many new providers because when you are new it is often difficult to discern a true potential client from a Time waster without experience. I am here to offer some help in identifying, managing and even using Time Wasters to your advantage. Before we get to all that first we need to define what exactly is a Time Waster? Also why would anybody even engage in such behavior?

According to the Urban dictionary, a Time Waster is a person who either consciously or unconsciously tries to engage you in a fruitless investment of your energy, time, money or attention. Every time waster I have dealt with fits this definition entirely.

As for what kind of person would engage in this behavior? Well, a time waster can be anyone of any age with the prerogative to get and use as much of your time as possible. Time wasters techniques can vary depending on the provider they are trying to steal time from however they do have some common red flags that can help you identify them.

1. If you have posted hours for when to contact you on whatever social media you have chosen, time wasters will contact you after hours.
2. Time wasters often will overshare details about themselves while dodging booking to keep communication flowing with you to steal your time.
3. They will sometimes offer a generous donation or extravagant gift, if you call, text or facetime/skype them first. Never do this. Always collect your required compensation before doing anything!
4. Sending pictures of themselves you did not ask for.
5. “Hey Wyd?” or “U available?” and just “Hey.” Are common greetings from time wasters.
6. Asking questions you have answered in your ads or website. Time wasters often wont follow your protocol you have posted on your socials.
7. Requesting services you don’t provide.
8. Asking for a quick cash meet but will not follow your screening protocol.
9. During screening they will ask for your ID after you ask for theirs.
10. Ask you about your relationship status and or attempt to talk you into meeting without compensation for your time.

After you have identified a suspected time waster the first thing to do is not to take any communication with them personally. You have control over how you communicate with them. You also have three options on how to deal with them.

1. The first option is to simply ignore them and move on. 
2. The second is to block them into oblivion. 
3. The third is to use them to practice identifying their patterns when contacting you.

Time wasters can, believe it or not, be useful. When I first started out I was flooded with time wasters and soon learned that they are a good indication that my ads were being seen. I would usually get a flood of time wasters followed by a good number of real clients. When I was a new I didn’t know how to tell potential clients from time wasters as I had no one to teach me. I had to learn by trial and error how to identify a suspected time waster. Once I learned how to spot them I started to use them. I would spend no more than five minutes communicating with them to learn some of the top ten techniques they used on me which I have shared with you.

It is important to learn how to tell real potential clients from time wasters because it will save you time and money. It will take some time and experience to develop a keen eye for spotting time wasters but when you do you will be able to smile and say, “Not today time waster!”